Self Care

Self care is extremely important, especially with how chaotic the world is right now. It’s okay to not be okay when the world isn’t okay. The vast majority of the world’s population haven’t lived in a pandemic before, so it’s okay to not always know what you need to do next.

But what you should always do is, learn to take care of yourself. It’s important to engage in healthy coping mechanisms like yoga, meditation, or other forms of exercises. Another tip is work on a plan on making sure you are getting enough sleep every night. Work on maintaining a healthy diet of vegetables and fruits.

But it’s also important to learn to take a rest, instead of quitting. Lets use this time of uncertainty to work together, and strengthen others, instead of bringing people down. It’s okay to ask for help. This pandemic is a hardship for everyone. Most importantly, make time to do things that make you happy.

Reminder of Our Perseverance

Last week, I was talking to my second cousin, and she has had a lot on her plate as of lately. I am fortunate that I am someone that she trusts enough to talk about these things with. I am happy to say that I give her so much support and love. Although I wish we live closer, but I hope we can catch up again soon. I miss her so much.

She has been dealing with some family drama and disagreements, and let’s face who hasn’t? I love sharing my wisdom with others. I enjoy helping people. She often feels overwhelmed and that whatever she is doing, is not enough. I always remind her, that what she is thinking is totally false, she just needs to change her mindset.

“It’s only a thought… and a thought can be changed.”

-Louise Hay

We are grateful to have each other in our lives.

I’m sure they are many people out there that can relate to dealing with family drama, and having relationship problems. (Talking to my cousin about this, has inspired me to write about how to solve relationship problems and conflicts, more to come). Don’t feel bad for not having “the perfect family”, no one really does, no matter how difficult that is to admit.

She has been addressing unhappiness with her job, as well. It’s easy for her to hate the world, and feel defeated with everything. But that isn’t the case, I tell her every chance I get of how amazing she is.

For everyone out there who may be dealing with one or all of these situations, it might be easy to just give up and roll over. But don’t! Use all of these challenging times as stepping stones to build something better.

I told my cousin, that it’s okay to have to go through these battles. It is mostly about how you deal with these confusing times. It’s truly important that during these times, they are handled in a healthy way. Using addictive alternatives (such as alcohol, drugs, sex, etc.) to cope with these struggles, it only fixes things temporarily, they do NOT solve problems in the long term. Resorting to such dangerous coping mechanisms only numbs your pain. I have learned from close friends in my life, that numbing the pain for awhile, just hurts even more when you finally feel it.

My suggestions to help you cope with all of these feelings, is to build a support system, where you can talk to trusted people about with what is happening in your life. Or just having one person is helpful enough. And if you don’t have anyone you feel comfortable discussing this with, which is okay, by the way, then that brings me to my alternative solution.

Write in a journal, write about anything you want, let it flow onto the page. You don’t have to let anyone read it if you don’t want to. It can be just for your eyes only. I am one who never had many friends, so I had to learn to be my own best friend.

Another thing, I have told her that starting a new job can be scary and terrible, but so is staying at a lousy job. Your life is far too short to spend it being anything but happy. So I recommended that she looks for another job, but at the same be thankful that she still has a job.

Everyone experiences relationship problems, but we should see it as an opportunity to discuss things that you are not happy with, and begin to think of solutions. You have to go through a storm to get a rainbow.

On our lower days it’s easy to just stay in bed, not wanting to deal with the world. Been there, done that and didn’t get much done. But what is important is that we make the time to take care of ourselves. It’s the simple things that add so many benefits. It’s the little things like making your bed, brushing your teeth and hair. They all make you feel so much better. And by doing those things takes no more than 15 minutes, and you will feel so much better. When you make your bed, you get a sense of accomplishment, and it gets the ball rolling for you wanting to do something more, and more.

When you are constantly allowing yourself to drown in everyone else’s lives and thoughts, it’s easy to forget about your needs and wants. Learn to take some time for you every day, not just on your lower days. Learn to set aside 15 minutes of your day, just on you. Or a little longer, depending on how you feel. Take a long, hot shower, or a warm bath with Epsom salts, and whatever else you need to feel relax and unwind.

Practicing meditating and doing various yoga poses can also help you de-stress, too. There are so many more videos are YouTube to help you. Perhaps, you are more into the arts, so maybe drawing or painting, may benefit you more. You just got to follow your heart and decide what is going to bring you the most joy.

“”Anyone out there who’s in junior high, high school, working it out, suffering — There are days you’re going to feel sad, you’re going to feel angry, you’re going to feel scared, that’s nothing you can choose, but you can make stuff. Make films, draw, write, It will make a world of difference.”

-Pete Docter, Inside Out Director Academy Award Acceptance Speech

Everyone should think what they truly want to happen from all of these difficult times. Everything happens for a reason, and it takes a bad apple to appreciate a good apple. Because we are going through tough times, we all get to decide why these things are happening to us. We decide why the universe threw all of this at us. Think of what you want to happen next. Think of goals or skills you would like to accomplish. Be as specific as you can. From there you can write about small manageable goals that you do in order to achieve your big goal. Be sure to let your support team know when you have accomplished your small goals, so they can celebrate you!

What ever you may be going through today, always remember that you are going to make it. What’s important is that you continue to love yourself in the process. Never stop loving yourself, or you will lose yourself. And a world without you, is not a lovely world. The world needs you — exactly how you are. The genuine you, not the person you pretend to be. Always stay true to yourself. You are always enough, and you are always loved.

With Love,
Three Yellow Daisies xo ❤

Feeling Off

Hey everyone, sorry that I haven’t been on much during the weekend. I just wasn’t feeling like myself and some stuff to sort through. I’m doing alright and that my family and myself are doing okay.

I just took some time for myself. I’m sure everyone has some days where we aren’t feeling like ourselves. We just got to take some time out to be reset and making ourselves a priority, again.

It was an emotional weekend, for sure. But a reminder to make self care necessary.

O For Onward

I am honestly over the moon happy that today was the last day of my job. I am now off to do better things in my life. I couldn’t be happier with myself.

For those who don’t know, I worked at a coffee shop, on and off for the last three and half years. And now I am off to new adventures.

I plan on taking more time for myself since I have learned the importance of self care. I have worked through bronchitis, laryngitis, the common cold (multiple times), ear infections, etc.. I didn’t call in, even though I knew I should have, but I was too much of a team player to call in otherwise. But having to work through all of that, made me realize that it is important to put myself first. Because if I don’t, who will?

It also taught me that I should focus one thing at a time. Don’t overthink things, but instead simplify things when I can. I also learned to deal with things as they happen. I learned this skill because whenever we emptied a pot of coffee, I would rinse it out right away, and begin to brew more. Having that skill at work, allowed me to think like that in my life, as well. Where I shouldn’t postpone things, but to deal with them right away. Don’t put off what you can do now.

I have met some really cool people along the way. I was also a trainer, so I had close interaction with the new trainees. That taught me how to lead and provide others with guidance and to believe in themselves. I thought I was a good trainer because I am very patient and a friendly person. I am thankful for gaining more leadership skills. Because I am still thinking about pursuing a career in managerial accounting, perhaps, later on in my life. Having experienced those shifts as a leader, it made me realize that I can be a leader.

I am looking forward to having more time to myself. I plan on going on more walks, and reading outside. I can catch up on my books and TV shows. I am so excited! I am also excited about not being tied down to anyone’s schedules, but for the one I make for myself.

I am so happy to have this opportunity for myself. I cannot wait to start living my best life. I hope all of my followers will share this journey with me. O for Onward.

Macklemore – Vipassana

Hey everyone! Welcome to this edition of Music Mondays!

One of my favourite singers is Macklemore. He has written a lot of powerful and meaningful songs, than just all of the fun songs like Thrift Shop which was a huge hit back in 2012. In his other songs, he talks about his recovery and how he stopped using drugs, and he shared with us his relapses and how he stopped using again. He also talked about how he supports LBGT Rights in a song called Same Love. He was also featured in one of Barack Obama’s weekly addresses back in May of 2016, talking about the dangers of being addicted to opioids and painkillers to help others know there is always help and for them to know they are not alone.

This week I picked Vipassana* to be the song of the week, because it really is a meaningful song. Vipassana is a Buddhist mediation that translates into insight, or special seeing. It is a form of mediation that concretes on the connection between your mind and body. It also allows you to be mindful of your inner self.

* Explicit language, since he does swear a few times.

“I don’t control life, but I can control how I react to it.”

-Macklemore ft Ryan Lewis, Vipassana

What I love about this song lyric, is the reminder that to truly be happy, you should focus on how you are reacting to whatever life is throwing at you. Life can throw you through several hoops, but know that things get better. You realize that you can’t always control everything in your life, but you can control how you are going to react to it. It is about accepting that yes, we are all going to have bad days, but just because we have our bad days, it doesn’t mean that we should let them bring us down. There isn’t much of a point to get upset over something you can’t control. Learn and appreciate the bad days.

Be More Selfish

“If you’re a giver, always
looking out for others,
always feeling drained
because you break
yourself so others can
stay together, take a
break from it. Add value
to your own life first.
Add self-love and peace
to your life first.”

-S. McNutt

I feel this quote speaks volume to me, because I used to be this person. I cared more about others than I did about myself. I used to think it was selfish to take care of myself, but now I see it as an essential. Because if I don’t care of myself, than how am I supposed to take care of other people? I couldn’t, really.

Self care is so important. Always remember to take care for yourself. Especially during these uncertain times. Always do things with love and passion.

Doing Me

I have always viewed taking care of yourself as a selfish act but now that I have focused on myself it isn’t a selfish but a selfless state like Eckhart Tolle said in The Power of Now. I am thoroughly enjoying that book. Now I’m not saying you have never have to help out people ever, you still can. I am showing us the difference between letting someone walk over you and helping them out. There is a difference.

I did a lot of things that we were just for me and not for anyone else. I went for a run. I washed the dishes and put them away. I swept my room. These tasks are so simple but they sparked a lot of joy to me. I also ate healthy foods from doing all of that exercises and stretches.

Lesson of the Day

Doing things for yourself isn’t a selfish it is a selfless state. Start small and build your way.

Self Care

The other night at a support group self-care was something I talked about with others. For the longest time I used to think that it was a selfish to take care of yourself. Because I thought it was necessary to take care of other peoples’ needs before you focus on your own needs. In which some relationships this is true. The exceptions are parents and a child or between children taking care of their elderly parents.

Now I’m learning that it is important to take care of yourself first. Make yourself a priority. If you are not taking of yourself, you’re telling the world that your needs do not matter. But your needs do matter.

How you treat yourself is how others will treat you. If you don’t show yourself respect don’t expect others to.

“In order to help take care of others, you must first learn how to take care of yourself.”

“What you do for yourself you’re doing for others and what you do for others you’re doing for yourself.”

“An empty lantern provides no light. Self-care is the fuel that allows it to shine vibrantly, lighting the ways for others.”