Talking Out Loud

Every week, I like to focus and write about simple ways that help lift us into better mood, that doesn’t require much energy or money. I call it Feel Good Fridays. I like to think that can help others.

What helped me get through my Grandpa’s stay at the hospital, was talking about my feelings with my aunts, and uncles. We shared a lot of our memories. I also talked about my feelings with my friends, too.

Whatever you are going through right now, it’s best to talk to someone you love and trust. If you aren’t able to talk to someone, you can always write about your feelings, too. I was thinking about setting up an email for my blog. So if you didn’t have anyone to talk to, I can be your person. I will keep you posted about that.

When I was younger, I didn’t really have many people to share my feelings with, so I often kept my feelings bottled up. I only had my journal to write about my feelings, and goals. So I have learned that it is important to release your feelings to someone you trust, and or love.

I felt a lot of sadness when my Grandpa had passed away. But I felt fortunate enough to have people that I can talk to about my feelings. I haven’t lost anyone this close to me before, so it was really hard to process my feelings, it still kind of is. But at the same time, I was so blessed to have all of these memories with him. I was fortunate enough to have said my goodbyes to him, not everyone gets that opportunity.

I also feel fortunate that I have a good support system, and my many friends in this blog universe. I appreciate everyone for the love and support.

Day 30

When you work together, you will be able to accomplish more together, than what you can accomplish on your own. Yesterday, we began moving and packing my mom’s things. We were able to do it fairly quickly, because we all worked together.

In life, it is important that we work together, rather than alone. I mean, yeah, there are some things that we can do alone, but sometimes it’s more fun to work as a team.

Today, I will recognize the benefits of working as a team. It is a lot of fun to work together. The more the merrier.

Thankful Thursdays #31 – January 28th, 2021

This is one of my favourite posts to write! I love to write and think about what I am thankful for. I hope I inspire you to think and reflect what you are grateful for throughout the week.

Here is a list of things that make me grateful.

  1. I am grateful that I get to babysit my niece, when her parents work. I enjoy the time we get to spend together. We read books, and we have tea parties together. Well, not real tea parties, yet, since she is almost two. We just pretend. But it’s still a lot of fun.
  2. I am grateful that my Grandparents helped my mom and myself pack up my mom’s stuff for her move. My mama has a lot of things, so I appreciated any help.
  3. I was able to pick up my holds at the library the other day. Picking up books at the library is always fun. I can’t wait to read them all. I am always excited to read books that I have never read before.
  4. I am thankful for talking to my friends, and family members especially when I have days where I feel upset, or sad about something.
  5. When I saw my Grandma the other day, she gave me her blanket that she meant to give us awhile ago when she gave us the set it goes with. It’s really warm, and cozy. It’s the perfect reading blanket.

Let me know what you are thankful for in the comments!

Day 22

I was helping my mom move out of her place. I knew that she has a lot of stuff, but when I saw it looking really disorganized especially for someone who is supposed to be ready for their move. My mom has a lot of dishes, and other things as well.

But from what I have learnt over the years is that it isn’t really a good thing that a single person has 20 dishes, and cups. Which is something that my mom has. All of her houses that she has stayed at are too small to have family over. So it’s not like all of those dishes were for us. It normally means that there is some underlining situation or a problem with this individual. There is research that shows a correlation between depression, and clutter. Clutter can also stem from trauma, or any traumatic experiences at some point in your lives.

My hearts go out to anyone who has experienced anything traumatic and heart wrenching. We may not be able to change anything from the past, but we can change our future. It’s up to us to make things better.

It took me some time to realize that part of the reason why she holds on to all of these things is because she lives alone now. So she holds on to these pieces as a way of holding on to the people that no longer live with her, like my dad, myself, and my sister. We all used to live together. But what I have learned is, that we don’t need to hold onto to things to remember people by, we remember things by keeping them in our hearts.

We can help our loved ones, or ourselves, if we are the ones who are suffering. We should not have to suffer in silence, call up a friend or a family member to help you. Although this mission can get done on its own. But if you prefer help, that’s okay, too. Slowly start removing clutter from your life. One of the easiest ways to stop having clutter is by stop having it come in your house and life, in the first place. Stop shopping for clutter. Stop agreeing to take things from loved ones. Another healthy solution is to work on ways you safely talk about things that has happened in your life.

I can identify the reasons and the whys my mom has had so many various things in her life. In a way, those reasons have made me collect clutter in high school. My parents were going through a separation at the time. But I have realized that I have collected so much, I was tired of it. So a few years later, I started being more cautious of my things. I started with my clothes. My closet used to be jam packed of clothes. I finally got rid of a ton of things. I was started to feel really good about myself. I was happy for myself.

Today, I will realize that clutter, and holding onto things don’t really make us happy. What makes us happy is being able to free from our clutter. We can’t hold onto every single memory throughout our lives. Our memories live inside of our brains and our hearts. If you see a family member or friend hold on to a lot of stuff, ask them if they need any help. Be sure to lend them a helping hand.

Thankful Thursday #30 – January 21st, 2021

I feel so honoured to be apart of the blog community. I love reading about people’s lives, success, and what they have learnt from their missteps. Even though we might hate to admit when things went wrong, but that’s where we learn the most things about ourselves.

I would love to read all of the things you are thankful for throughout the week. Here is my list.

  1. The motivation of wanting to write a story. Although finding the time, is another issue. I am thankful that I have the desire to write a story. I have been really wanting to get back into writing. Hopefully when my schedule becomes less busy, I can get back into writing again.
  2. I am thankful for the time I spent cleaning and tidying my room, so I am able to enjoy spending it in a clean environment.
  3. I am glad that I got to spend an extra day with my boyfriend, he took a day off throughout the week. We got to spend more time than we would have.
  4. I am grateful for being able to talk to my friends and family members via text messages since we live far away, and can’t travel to see each other.
  5. I am grateful that I am able to stay true to reading 30 minutes a day despite how busy some of my days have been.

Day 21

There are going to come several days throughout your life, where life may seem so chaotic and stressful. Sometimes it can’t be avoided, sometimes it can be. But whenever life is throwing stress your way, always remember to stay calm, perhaps take a moment to pause. This might help enlighten you and solve whatever you are going through.

Or perhaps you can write about it in a journal, or talk it over with a friend, or a family member. Whatever you choose to help cope through a mess, always remain calm about the situation. Find your way to remain tranquil during times of stress and or uncertainty.

Today, no matter how stressful my situation and life is, I will try my best to stay calm. Things can get better from this. And most of the bad times in our lives often lead to the best times.

Day Seven

This is from Thursday (yesterday).

Never be afraid to ask for help, and never be afraid to give help to others. My Mama had asked me if I could help her pack for her move. I was happy to help. I made some beef soup for dinner, and I made it in my crock pot. I knew that when she dropped me off back at home that the soup would be finished. I was able to give her some soup. My mama enjoyed the soup.

I love helping people. I have helped out a lot of my family throughout the week, I baby say my niece the other day, so my sister can pick up a shift at work. And then I started helping mom with her packing. It was fun to spend some time with her, since we haven’t since the whole pandemic.

I sometimes feel bad asking others for help, because I know how busy my family is, and some family members I talk to, live far away. So, I mostly just ask for advice, or we just talk. But that’s okay. If I need any help, I normally just ask my boyfriend.

Today, I will not be afraid to ask for help, nor will I be afraid to give help to others. It is a freeing and powerful feeling to be able to help others.

Day Six

This is from Wednesday.

For all of my new followers, every day I post about important life lessons, with affirmations to help you live the best live. These lessons can be learned from the day, or throughout my life. I really hope this inspires you to make better choices, and appreciate what you have in your life.

Although right now, I am a bit behind.

My boyfriend had the day off, so him and I spent the day relaxing and just being together. It was a nice break. To love and to be loved is amazing feeling, so we shouldn’t either feelings for granted. Don’t feel bad if you haven’t found your person yet, you will. In the meantime, you can still send love to your family and friends. Always tell your friends and family that you love them, no matter what. We aren’t always gifted a tomorrow, so never go a day without telling them.

My boyfriend and I spent the day watching our shows, and had dinner together, even though we do that all the time, Wednesday just felt extra special.

Today, I will express and accept love from my family and friends.

How to Have a Merry but Stress Less Christmas

I know this is a bit late. But I know they are some people out there that start Christmas shopping right after Christmas, for the sales, and whatever else. Shopping is an addiction. I hope this helps other have a more cheerful Christmas with less stress, and more money in your pockets. These ideas can be applied to birthday presents, too.

Everyone knows how stressful Christmas can be. And yet, everyone we swear next year will be different, it will be less stressful. But the cycle just continues and things become more extravagant than the year prior.

If you are sort of in a holidaze from the stress, or from the mess of Christmas. I have solutions for you!

Cut Back on Gift Giving

Instead of going into thousands of dollars in debt, like some do. But it doesn’t have to be this way. You can have a family discussion via Zoom, or Skype, depending on your restrictions. What I am trying to do is keep it simple as possible, but still enjoyable for others.

Buy them the following;

  • Something they want
  • Something they need
  • Something to wear
  • Something to read

That way you just only need to buy four things for everyone, instead of your typical pile of gifts. This is a good solution if you are looking for ways to cut back on buying some many presents for everyone.

Or another solution is to have everyone pitch in money for one big present.

Cut Back On Presents

Or perhaps you want to cut back on presents completely. That way you just enjoy each other’s company. Perhaps it has become too much hauling all of these presents to peoples’ houses. Or maybe you just don’t want to buy people actual presents, and objects. Then perhaps an idea for you would be to give people an experience. I hope things are different next year, where more things are more available for us to do.

Some ideas of experiences are,

  • Concert tickets
  • Movie/Plays/Stand up comedy, etc.
  • Spa Outing
  • Wine tasting (depending on the age of the recipient)
  • Other festivals if they are too young, or don’t drink

Give Others Your Time

Another solution is to give others your time, it’s free!

Perhaps you can offer a sibling, or a friend, or a neighbour a night off from their kids, so they can enjoy a night out. Or perhaps you know how to cook this delicious meal, you can teach someone else to make it. Or you know how to crochet, or knit, you can always offer to teach someone else how to do that.

By cutting back on giving out presents you don’t have to wrap any presents, which is a plus, too. Less work to do. And it also helps the environment, since most places don’t allow wrapping paper to be recycled, so all of that just ends up in a landfill. If you are still handing out gifts, perhaps you can use dish clothes, or scarves, or a blanket, instead.

Secret Santa

Secret Santa is when you put names in a hat, and you secretly place names of everyone in the group. Each person pulls out a name from the hat. That is who they are supposed to shop for. You would have a discussed budget, of how much money you want to spend, and you have to stay under that amount. You can discuss some things you would like to receive for Christmas, and your Secret Santa will buy you some of those things for you.

Don’t be a Michael Scott

I don’t know how many of you watch The Office, but there was this one Christmas episode, where they did Secret Santa, they had a $20 limit. Michael bought a $400 iPod, and got mad because Phyllis was Michael’s Secret Santa, and she knitted him an oven mitt. Please don’t be that guy that overspends on Christmas, especially when you know this person doesn’t have a lot of money. You don’t want the other person to feel bad that you didn’t get as many presents as much as you had given them.

Respect Their Wishes

Sometimes people say they don’t want any gifts. Please know they really mean no gifts. Some people realize they are already happy with everything they already have, and would not have someone go out and spend money on them. There is no secret language to “No gifts”, that isn’t their way to trick you, and making you wonder if they actually mean. Or if it means they just “don’t know yet”. If someone tells you no gifts, please honour their wish.

Shoe Box Ideas

I just heard of this idea not too long ago. You can fill a shoe box, filled with envelopes with different gift cards to different occasions for each month. You can only open an envelope on the first day of the month, and you make plans sometime throughout the month to do that activity. This works great for children, because they get the activity and the anticipation of not knowing which adventure they will be partaking in. I think that is an amazing idea. And if you can’t afford to buy all of the gift cards at once, you can just write a letter and letting them about each activity. That way you just have to budget this in once a month, instead of having to come up with x amount of money before Christmas.

Or another idea is that you can ask other people for money, or ask for mini hygiene products, and perhaps a backpack they no longer use (but it’s still in good condition). You can fill up a backpack with toothbrushes, toothpaste, money, shampoo and conditioner, deodorant, etc. You can give this to a homeless person, or to a shelter. I suggest using the traveler size of things, so it is easier for them to carry around, and you can fit more stuff in the bag.

Christmas doesn’t have to cost a fortune to be memorable. Christmas is about helping others, spread love, and happiness. We should begin to refrain ourselves from the commercialization, that we have suddenly allowed to be the norm of Christmas.

Advent Calendar of Kindness 2020 Day 21

I have really enjoyed writing about this topic of kindness, and how much joy we can spread to each other. It is a lot more positive than just spending money, making us go in debt.

Today’s challenge is to let someone know that they have changed your life, or has inspired you to do better. It can be written as a letter, email, or text message, or you can call up this person and let them how much of an impact they had on your life. I’m sure this person would love to hear that they had such an inspiring impact on your life.